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The first time someone saw a comet, they called it “sky’s ex…
NERDS GONE WILD
The first time someone saw a comet, they called it “sky’s ex texting.” Unexpected, bright, and dramatic.
✗ FAKE
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The first lab goggles were created after eyebrows went missing in action. Safety is written in burnt hair.
Einstein tried to patent relativity as a productivity hack. Which would’ve been the ultimate “I’m late, but it’s theoretical.”
The first microscope discovery was “dust.” Which is why science and cleaning have beef.
Rainbows were originally classified as “light showing off.” Which explains why they appear only after drama.
The human body has 206 bones because 205 looked “unfinished.” Perfectionism is anatomical.
Comets are made of ice, dust, and rock. Dirty snowballs with excellent PR.
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